master crap

flew into hnl last night. had a great (though) tiring week with alix. highlights include a banging aesop rock concert, a pretty disasterous usc frat row on opening night with the pitzer kids (alexa, matt, sam), pitzer bff drama, fairfax highschool swap meet where i scored an amazing cashmere sweater on the cheap, the gorgeous getty villa, sneaking into disneyland for free, and some dank cali-o.

now to buisness.
i am overweight. since october of last year, i've gained a whopping 25 pounds.
i blame this on three things:
1) gross vodka consumption
2) spending lots of time alone
3) the entire state of alaska

a shot of vodka has 90 calories in it. that means getting drank adds a good 1000 calories to my diet and a bit of umph to my backside. when i'm alone (either traveling or at home) i tend to eat more. this isn't depression or the filling of some personal void with cheese, but simply the fact that i like to eat well and get enormous pleasure from it. i like to eat very well and very often...
and finally, my favorite place in the world, alaska. on my private island in alaska, we didn't always have internet or phone reception or even light, sooo when we were bored we would eat. eat crappy food that was bad for you. ergo ten pounds this summer.

in lieu of all this, i'm going on master cleanse for ten days if it kills me. i did this lemon/maple syrup diet last year for 5 days and was completely fine (though i did start watching food network like i was a 12 year old boy watching internet porn). ten days is the standard, and what i will do this time. wish me luck, i'll be crapping a lot and probably get pretty grumpy. welcome home.